MBK NEWSLETTER
PLAYOFF EDITION!
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Team of the Week
Congratulations to Ellis The Don and Schuba for their Team of the Week performances!
Regular Season Accolades
As we wrap up the 2nd annual MBK Fantasy Football League, the commissioners would like to thank everyone for their dedication this year.
Week 13 is the FIRST week of the playoffs, so be prepared!
AFC Regular Season Winner – Team Acqua
Congratulations to the reigning champs, Team Acqua, on an outstanding performance back-to-back years.
“The rich get richer” – Antonio Acquaviva
Team Acqua had a very successful back half of the season, with 6 wins in a row.
NFC Regular Season Winner – The Metric
Congratulations to the best dressed and most flamboyant commissioner duo in the league.
“We managed to take our wins when we could. With the Omicron Variant, our bench is hurt and we are in deep water.” – Coach Mills
The Metric has Derrick Henry, D’Andre Swift, Julio Jones, and Deebo Samuel on the bench… It looks like a tough road ahead.
Biggest Bounce Back – Schuba
“Coming in last place last year… we knew we had to do our homework coming into the draft.” – Coach Schuba
After a strenuous draft, Coach Schuba was confident his team would bounce back, landing a top 6 spot this year.
From Shit to Shit – Bianchi Bros
“Guys will be guys. Some things will never change” – Christian’s ex-girlfriend
“We had the best TOTW ratio to our wins” – Coach Christian
NEWSFLASH… no one cares baud.
With a dismal 4-7 performance, Team Bianchi will discuss how they should allocate their funds next year.
Too Big To Handle – Skip and Shannon, Top Degens
Coming into the league, Coach Strazz was confident with his knowledge, scouting reports, and draft day buzz.
“Bro, who’s in this league no one fucking knows what they’re doing! $70 bucks for Zeke” – Coach Strazz
Well… better luck at next year’s draft bud.
Remember, you can always buy another franchise.
Skip and Shannon are wondering if they’ll be relegated to D2 for next year after this year’s performance.
“We’ll have to see what the MBK commissioners say. If we have to play in the B-League for a year, so be it.
You Missed The Playoffs – See below
In the AFC, Wranglers, Moneyball, Skip and Shannon, and Matty P’s Entourage all slipped out of the playoffs (bottom 3 actually had no chance).
In the NFC, Top Degens, SHINETIME, Dak Biscott, and Gordo all missed the playoffs.
Dak Biscott was too worried about telling Sfroz and Refroz who to waiver wire, and forget he had a team of his own.
You’re a Mediocre Fuck – Everyone else
If you didn’t get mentioned, it’s not because you have a great team, but you don’t have a shit team either.
Good luck in the playoffs you mediocre fuck.
Matchup Previews – NFC
Below is a list of the matchup previews for MBK Playoffs!
(8) Mastro G-Tass @ (1) The Metric
Early predictions show A BIG upset with Mastro G-Tass pummeling The Metric.
The Metric is in shambles, with their whole bench being injured. Mastro G-Tass got a great opportunity to stick their nose in the playoffs, combined with better luck of this shaken up Metric team… they could go far!
Can Bourne carry The Metric to victory?
(7) Ellis The Don @ (2) PrimeTime
Not too shabby for a guy who didn’t draft his own team… Ellis!
Heading into this matchup, the underdog is a favourite to win by 30 points!
Ellis is heading into the matchup with a healthy team, no healthy scratches or Omicron problems…
Can we take down The Don?
(6) Team Hercules @ (3) Jordan and Antonio
The closest matchup going into Week 13 has the underdog, HERCULES beating Jordan + Antonio by less than 1 point.
Jordan and Antonio will rely on an outstanding performance by RB1 Austin Ekeler, who could easily put up 9 or 30 points on any given Sunday.
(5) Dalvin and the Chipmunks @ (4) Scary Terry
Another close matchup has favourite Scary Terry just edging out Dalvin and the Chipmunks.
“We’ve got a tough choice. Do we play Devin [Singletary] or Matt [Breida]?”- Coach Dalvin
Scary Terry is hoping that Zack Moss takes carries away, as this will be a heavy Buffalo Bills centred game.
“From 2nd last place to a playoff appearance… I’m just happy we made it here”.
– Commish Scary Terry
Matchup Previews – AFC
(8) undR the radR @ (1) Team Acqua
Can co-commish Benigno defeat the reigning champs Acqua? MBK Advanced AI 2.0 predicts a win by Team Acqua by 15 points.
“If we win this week, we’re winning it all.” – Coach Benigno
(7) Catch The Blitz @ (2) Hareem Kunt
A battle between David v.s. Goliath… if Goliath had a podcast.
In this matchup, our Advanced AI is showing Mr. Blitz himself as Goliath.
Hareem Kunt doesn’t seem to be worried though, with a impressive last few weeks.
“As always, don’t forget to rate, subscribe, and download our latest episode on YouTube!” – Mr. Blitz
(6) Schuba @ (3) Tank For Tua
A matchup between Bonnie and Clyde.
Tank for Tua is going to be without its star receiver, Amari, just because they don’t do vaccines in Jerry World. Amari Cooper was spotted last week at an anti-vax rally (see picture below).
Team Schuba is trying to figure out which of the 7 running backs on his team that he wants to start.
(5) Waiver Saviours @ (4) Sfroz’it and Refroz’it
The Guida’s aren’t looking down as dogs in this one. For a team who drafted 3 of the best QBs in the league, they’re just happy to be competing at this high level.
Sfroz’ and Refroz’ has been Unfroz’ing a little bit more this year. Heading into the matchup with more stress than last year, they’ll have to rely on cheesecakes to step up and prove their worth.
Sfroz’ and Refroz’ were powerhouses last year and struggled to get back to that this year. The coaching staff will look to make some personnel changes this year.